What a week this has been. School was busy and three days I had people in my room observing something. Twice it was a student teacher doing observation, another time the Academic Lead Teacher from my department, and then two assistant principals showed up in my level class on Thursday.
I've been trying to put things together for a substitute to use when I'm gone for the birth of my new grandson. But, it's hard to do when you're not sure exactly when you'll be needing the sub. Tyler, this is Memom...don't come until after Open House and Gigi's surgery on Tuesday.
The schedule is for Mother to go into St. Joseph's hospital on Tuesday and have cement injected into the spine between disks to give her some relief from the pain she has been in. She's pretty anxious about how all this is going to go, and I had never said that I would be able to take off and be with her. She thought I'd just leave this up to my brother, but I won't. She'll feel better if I go along too.
Last night I missed Kate and Tom's 40th anniversary party because Mother was in a lot of pain, she was emotionally exhausted and she was full of narcotic pain reliever. I couldn't possibly have left her. But I found myself feeling irritable and crabby with Jean when she called to find out why I wasn't there. I felt resentful that there was this expectation that one would not have any reason to miss the occasion.Who put her in charge of policing social obligations?
I do feel better tonight after getting those damned Federal Mandate Projects graded and recorded. I've been carrying them around for a week. I graded papers for my level class tonight and I have to give grades for the political ideology assignments the AP kids emailed to me. Then, I'm closing out the six weeks and I'll be good to go if Tyler comes before the six weeks actually ends on Friday.
Getting the laundry done, the groceries bought and the house tidied up just the slightest bit has helped my mood too. I find that being mentally and emotionally caught between Mother and Berit, between work and home, and between friends and family has to be about as uncomfortable a situation as I've ever experienced.
I find that my attention is short and my focus is fuzzy no matter what I'm trying to do. I don't consciously worry about any of this, but my subconscious evidently hasn't gotten word not to fret. My left wrist has a a huge not on the underside and sometimes hurts like hell. I feel tired pretty much all the time.
I'm trying to get some exercise and yesterday and today I popped in the ear buds and went to town for thirty minutes on the gazelle. Broke a sweat even. Then I even did a little therapeutic knitting and watched some football.
Mother feels better today I can tell. I bought her a transport chair today at the drugstore. Now she won't have to worry about walking from the car to the hospital on Tuesday. There's nothing like being able to relieve some one's anxiety about a thing like that...best $119. 99 I ever spent.
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